Is my silence violence? The contrarian call for silence from within

I think being silent sometimes can be wise. Not only does it allow me to listen to those around me in the traditional sense, it also allows me to listen within, which is more needed than ever.

Silence can hold things that talking and taking action cannot. Silence can be nonviolent in ways that talking and taking action cannot. Holding that which is present without manipulating it with words, ideas or constructs; without the need to change, fix or shift it in any way.

Which sounds antithetical to this moment when so much needs to change. When silence is associated with complicity. When the pervasive reality of racial injustice has been historically silenced from view. 

But I believe there’s a need for silence in this moment from some of us. Not scared, feeble silence that cowers in the presence of this reality. And not slide-y silence that avoids, deflects and ignores. No, we need attentive silence. Observant silence. Silence that listens for and listens to the ghosts knocking at our doors and the trauma that’s coming to the surface. To the intergenerational and historical trauma that’s palpable within our bodies and collective consciousness. To hear it and see it in new ways. To allow it to be felt in our bodies and experienced with new eyes. 

So please don’t confuse my recent public silence for complicity. I’ve been navigating and taking care of manifestations of this moment in time on my own side. Manifestations of the cycle of abuse and co-dependence that’s prevalent in our world and that I believe are at play at a deeper level within this issue. Breaking patterns related to the victim-perpetrator-savior cycle. All in the name of my commitment to the cultural change work I’ve been dedicated to my entire adult life. All in the name of giving birth to the newness that’s right around the corner.

My sleeves are rolled up, y’all. I’m grateful to be alive. 

Hi, I’m Liz Moyer Benferhat. Writer, facilitator, coach, and development practitioner dedicated to the subtle interplay between how inner transformation feeds the outer transformation we need in the world. Welcome 🌿